Fury Warrior Plans Gobal Conquest, Gets Sand in Codpiece
Making movies, making music and FIGHTING AROUND THE WORLD!
As part of the World Explorer achievement, each of the four continenets must be explored – Northrend, Outland, Eastern Kingdoms, and Kalimdor. Northrend was a breeze to finish, because who can’t fly around for an hour or two. Since it was more or less a fluke to finish one of the four, I decided a more focused effort would be needed to finish off the remaining three. Outland would be last, to cap off more flying. Which left the Old World. I had a twenty-sided die nearby (of course I did – and any nerd worth their salt should have one too), and with a single roll my next step of World Domination was set before me.
Welcome to Endor, er I mean Kalimdor.
Like most of my masterful plans, I decided I would start from the bottom and work my way to the top. I took a flight path to Gadgetzan and began plotting my route. Turns out that Herc had been busy in his younger swath of destruction days and had nailed down most of the locations I had hoped to cap in one sitting. It took a few minutes of riding before I managed to complete Explore Tanaris Desert.
One of the perks of having been through many of these locations before is that Herc had the flight paths. When you’re covering many miles, it’s always best to rack up Air Miles whenever you can. Saves time, and over a number of hours, saves sanity. It wasn’t a long flight, but landing in Un’Goro Crater kept things rolling. Again, only a few spots needed to be explored so Herc mounted up on his Alpine Goat of Death and a few more minutes later I’d finished Exploring Un’Goro Crater.
This is when it started to get strange. I was riding north to the path taking me to Silithus, and I noticed that I wasn’t seeing any beasts. Nothing flying, nothing crawling. Granted, it was one in the morning but that shouldn’t have mattered to the in-game talent. Maybe I was just tired and my eyes were playing tricks. Maybe every living creature in Craterville heard that Herc the Merc was in town, and decided it was safer to head to Freeport (Everquest reference FTW). I kept riding, entered Silithus and headed across the zone to the few places I needed to explore. It took some time but I reached the point I needed to, yet I wasn’t being credited with the discovery. Right about then I noticed the angry red monitor button on my UI. I checked the latency and saw a number higher than Lindsay Lohan after four rails of breakfast cocaine.
Breakfast is the *sniff* most important meal *sniffsniff* of the day.
I wasn’t sure what that meant for certain, but it was clear I couldn’t go any further until I cleared up the issue. I exited the game and rebooted (twice) before I was able to log back in. There I was, back in the south of Un’Goro Crater. Great. Two a.m. was yelling at me from my watch, but I had to finish the southern part of the continent. I would not walk away having only seen sand and a giant hole with some T-Rexes running around in it. I grabbed a Pepsi Max, gulped it down, and got back to business.
The caffeine might not have been a good idea. The spiked alertness was good, but the crash afterward gave me keyboard dimples on my forehead. When I woke up, I noticed that I Had Been Busy.
Before I dragged myself to bed, I took a final look at the Map of Conquest for Kalimdor.
There’s still plenty of grey on that list, but it’s only a matter of time before another continent falls to Herc the Merc.
Blizzcon 2010 Tickets
Tickets went on sale tonight at 9pm Central. After an evening at the gym, followed by a few errands, I’d burned up enough time to be within striking distance of Ticket Time.
8:35 – I sit down at the computer and navigate to the screen where I will be buying tickets. I go through my Battle.net account to make sure all my information is up to date. I decide that I can’t stare at the computer for twenty-five minutes or I just may go mad. Maybe a quick shower and shave would help pass the time. At the very least, it’ll hose off the remaining gym grime. Yuck.
8:51 – Having completed the face-shaving portion of my cleansing ritual, I poke my head out of the shower to make sure I have time to complete the head-shaving job. With only nine minutes to go, and shaving cream running into my eyes (and you thought shampoo burned), I decide not to tempt Fate. I hop out of the shower and wipe off the remaining foam. My head looks like some kind of fraternity prank.
8:56 – I commence with the pressing of F5.
8:57 – F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5
8:58 – I suspect that somewhere on my keyboard is a magic button that will get me to the front of the queue. I cannot afford these sorts of distractions, and the message on the screen mocks me that the tickets are “not yet available”.
8:59 – I press F5 OMG SNUCK IN *click*
(Currently in Queue)
Wait, I was going to get two tickets! I only ordered one! Damn my spastic clicking habit!
(Position: 8337 – Estimated time: 1 hour)
Well it’s better than last year. Maybe that half-second that I saved by not clicking on the drop-down menu will get me to Blizzcon!
9:03 – Position: 7696, 86% of stock left. Plenty of tickets yet. I feel strongly about my chances of getting a ticket.
9:08 – Position: 6918, 71% of stock left. Strength wavering slightly. I decide to go watch the hockey game to pass the time. Wonderful idea lasts all of two minutes before I get up, grab a beer, and return to the computer.
9:17 – Position: 5442, 36% of stock left. What the Hell? Everybody must be buying the max number of tickets per click to go down that quickly. My strenght fades, and I hope for a fluke to get in this time around.
9:19 – Position: 5157, 30% of stock left. The feeling of dread has set in, and my odds are not looking so good. Three thousand people bought tickets so far, and that was 70% of the tickets available. Basic math is telling me the odds are not in my favor. Still, I wait for the inevitable.
9:25 – At Position: 4494 in queue when the axe comes down. Tickets are now Sold Out.
9:27 – Blizzcon 2010 tickets are on sale on Ebay. The prices range from $350 to $618 per ticket. I want to force-feed my monitor to these people, and not through their mouthes.
Even worse, I will be AFK on Saturday. Therefore it looks like Blizzcon 2010 will be Herc-free this year.












