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Global Conquest Complete
I’ll bet you thought I’d forgotten about this.
Hells no.
I had a good stretch where I managed to knock off Eastern Kingdom, which left only Outland to complete. Piece of cake when you ride a jacked up rocket like Herc does.
Still, my eyes crunch when I blink which means I think I’ve spent enough time in front of a monitor for one day. Short post, but between Lotteries and crafting epic helicopters for Rukgut to pilot, I’d had enough.
This is Herc the Merc – World Explorer.
Herculano Conquers A Nation
Yeah, I don’t like your odds either.
Herc’s first brush with the Alliance in this phase of Operation: World Explorer resulted in deaths.
None of which were his.
The strategy this time around was to finish exploring the mainland of Kalimdor, before attacking the island zones inhabited by the Alliance. It’d been awhile since I’d seen many of these zones, especially Darkshore. Being more of an Alliance zone, I had forgotten some of the more interesting landmarks it provided.
A big knife through the forehead. Artwork I can appreciate.
Taking in the scenery was fine and dandy, but there was work to be done. So Herc worked it, baby.
That was the mainland. The question now was – how do I reach the islands? The ships were protected by high level Alliance guards, but that was all the recon I had on them. Were they Elites? Was I going to have to pull a Spirit Rez gimmick to get to where I needed to go?
The answer came to me in a vision.
Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful.
It was obvious: Wipe them out. All of them.
I’d like to thank the good folks in Auberdine for their hospitality as Herc waited for the ship to arrive. Their insistence that I pay for my ticket, which was met with a severe case of Axe to the Face, helped to pass the time. Herc mounted up on his Devil Goat as the ship arrived, and he rode onto the deck.
Pictured Above: Alliance Military Force, in no hurry to ask Herc for his ticket.
Nobody moved, nobody got hurt. Despite the fact that they were all targetable, and they were all level 75, the ride was uneventful. That changed once I reached the shore and rode towards the big purple teleport sphere to Darnassus. Those folks wanted to fight.
Bad idea.
A few minutes later, Teldrassil was under the fist of Herc the Merc.
After the conquest, Herc rode back to the dock to catch the boat back to Auberdine. There, he’d take the next ship to Azuremyst Isle, say Hi to the Space Goats, and wrap up the Kalimdor leg of World Domination.
Herculano was not alone on that dock. There were Alliance players there. And Herc was flagged for PVP. They started talking, but it was all [Common] gibberish. Finally, one Night Elf Warrior had enough of this Tauren and his Devil Goat, and he attacked.
And attacked.
And attacked.
He was level nine.
The easy thing would have been to dismount and crush him. But Herc was in a good mood, and it was much more entertaining to just ignore him and move on. Still, I respect his insanity and suicidal nature so to Valtar, I tip my hat.
I assume his meds kicked in at this point and he decided he’d take the next boat to Auberdine.
I wish I could say the rest of the trip was as entertaining. I didn’t see a soul in Draenei Land. With a shrug and a sigh, Herc dug his heels into his Devil Goat’s ribs and knocked off the final two zones –
… and finally –
Boo Yah!
It may be a week or two before I start the next phase of Operation: World Explorer. Herc has let his JC dailies slip, and Gold is a good thing to have. But it’s nice to see the zones one final time before Cataclysm, so I’m sure it’ll be sooner rather than later before Herc the Merc enters Phase Three.
This is Herc the Merc, reminding newbie Warriors to stay on their meds, or up the dosage.
Long Way Round
Sitting in a saddle for too long is not good for the butt.
I had some free time this afternoon, so I decided I would attempt to finish up a few more steps on the stairway to World Domination. During which time I would also have Herc queue up for his daily random Heroic. Multitasking – it’s what all the cool kids are doing when they’re not being cool!
As frustration would have it, the word of the day was LAG. I’m not sure why, but the past few time I logged on to play WoW I’ve really been having latency issues. I have a few suspicions as to what the culprit is, but needless to say, everything was slow going. Multiple deaths in Heroics (hard to stay out of the stupid when you die before you even know you’re in trouble), not to mention the numerous disconnects caused by riding around a zone. Booted due to sightseeing. Apparently my computer was stoned and would rather check out the birds flying overhead than send data packets to the WoW servers.
Duuuude…
While my eye twitched and I wished evil on the Gods of Red Latency (seriously, 1900-3200ms WTF), Herculano stomped through zones. His was an angry journey, but when he finally decided he’d had enough he hopped off his Talbuk and dropped his saddle-raw butt in the Zoram Strand. Herc put on the miles today, all on Goatback –
That pretty much leaves only the northern section of Kalimdor left to explore. Unfortunately, it means that Herc the Merc is probably going to be getting his hands dirty when he tries to explore the Night Elf and Space Goat Islands. Oh well, can’t make an omlette without breaking a few skulls – eggs, I meant eggs.
* * *
In other news, Blizzcon tickets went on sale this weekend. I was unable to be near a computer when they were posted, so I am currently without Blizzcon tickets. I’ve put the word out as far as buying a ticket if someone ends up with an extra, but I’m not about to pay triple the listed price on Ebay just to get one. At least, I don’t think I am.
This is Herc the Merc – There may be Alliance blood on my hands in the future, but I’d rather have my palm crossed with a Blizzcon ticket. I’ve always wondered about ‘con funk.
Anyhow, have a week.
Fury Warrior Plans Gobal Conquest, Gets Sand in Codpiece
Making movies, making music and FIGHTING AROUND THE WORLD!
As part of the World Explorer achievement, each of the four continenets must be explored – Northrend, Outland, Eastern Kingdoms, and Kalimdor. Northrend was a breeze to finish, because who can’t fly around for an hour or two. Since it was more or less a fluke to finish one of the four, I decided a more focused effort would be needed to finish off the remaining three. Outland would be last, to cap off more flying. Which left the Old World. I had a twenty-sided die nearby (of course I did – and any nerd worth their salt should have one too), and with a single roll my next step of World Domination was set before me.
Welcome to Endor, er I mean Kalimdor.
Like most of my masterful plans, I decided I would start from the bottom and work my way to the top. I took a flight path to Gadgetzan and began plotting my route. Turns out that Herc had been busy in his younger swath of destruction days and had nailed down most of the locations I had hoped to cap in one sitting. It took a few minutes of riding before I managed to complete Explore Tanaris Desert.
One of the perks of having been through many of these locations before is that Herc had the flight paths. When you’re covering many miles, it’s always best to rack up Air Miles whenever you can. Saves time, and over a number of hours, saves sanity. It wasn’t a long flight, but landing in Un’Goro Crater kept things rolling. Again, only a few spots needed to be explored so Herc mounted up on his Alpine Goat of Death and a few more minutes later I’d finished Exploring Un’Goro Crater.
This is when it started to get strange. I was riding north to the path taking me to Silithus, and I noticed that I wasn’t seeing any beasts. Nothing flying, nothing crawling. Granted, it was one in the morning but that shouldn’t have mattered to the in-game talent. Maybe I was just tired and my eyes were playing tricks. Maybe every living creature in Craterville heard that Herc the Merc was in town, and decided it was safer to head to Freeport (Everquest reference FTW). I kept riding, entered Silithus and headed across the zone to the few places I needed to explore. It took some time but I reached the point I needed to, yet I wasn’t being credited with the discovery. Right about then I noticed the angry red monitor button on my UI. I checked the latency and saw a number higher than Lindsay Lohan after four rails of breakfast cocaine.
Breakfast is the *sniff* most important meal *sniffsniff* of the day.
I wasn’t sure what that meant for certain, but it was clear I couldn’t go any further until I cleared up the issue. I exited the game and rebooted (twice) before I was able to log back in. There I was, back in the south of Un’Goro Crater. Great. Two a.m. was yelling at me from my watch, but I had to finish the southern part of the continent. I would not walk away having only seen sand and a giant hole with some T-Rexes running around in it. I grabbed a Pepsi Max, gulped it down, and got back to business.
The caffeine might not have been a good idea. The spiked alertness was good, but the crash afterward gave me keyboard dimples on my forehead. When I woke up, I noticed that I Had Been Busy.
Before I dragged myself to bed, I took a final look at the Map of Conquest for Kalimdor.
There’s still plenty of grey on that list, but it’s only a matter of time before another continent falls to Herc the Merc.
Fury Warrior Succumbs To Flood
Fast food makes you retain water.
Short post this weekend. Herculano, World Explorer / Conqueror, will have to wait for another day. I spent the weekend bailing water out of my basement, patching leaks in my sunroom, and wishing much hateful pain on Mother Nature. Something involving nail guns, open sores, and fire ants.
Wednesday is the first batch of Blizzcon Tickets going on sale. I’ll be all over that @ 7pm Central, and probably disappointed by 7:01 Central. I’m going by myself, but I’m planning on trying to buy two tickets. Contemplating what to do with the other ticket should I survive the queue – sell it to Alt’s guildmates, maybe set up a contest on the blog and offer it as a prize? Who knew that Fury also meant insane!
Tomorrow after work, I may have some time to ride around and get some exploring done. I’ve already completed Northrend, and I’d like to save Outland for the last “continent” to explore. Any suggestions as far as where I should explore next?
Rokk Talk 